Dealing With Manipulative People (Reader Inquiry)

Reader Inquiry: I was wondering if you could recommend a specific remedy of Ho’oponopono or manifesting that can help me be free from individuals who are running my life in directions I don’t want to go?

For example, I have a colleague who has sort of Communist vibes or if he isn’t Communist, then he is an Activist with methods I am not interested in, but because he acts as my sort of defacto supervisor in my current job, I feel I have no say on the matter…

Ho’oponopono states that we can’t change others, only ourselves, but do you believe just repeating the 4 phrases or staying Present and Centered in Being can eventually resolve the situation?

Response: To answer your question, yes, I do believe a spiritual process will resolve your issue provided the spiritual process focuses on internal responses and not external conditions; and that your spiritual process does not emphasize trying to bring about a particular outcome.

Here’s my advice to you: Spend most of your time and effort focusing on yourself and not on other people and what they may, or may not, be doing. Change your mind? Change your world.

Change your mind, change your world.

We really have to get out from behind our egos, which constantly judge external conditions and tell us that we are vulnerable and in need of defense against forces in the world that act upon us. When we buy into this we are imprisoning ourselves in the ego’s domain, the foundation of which is fear and hatred.

The ego wants us to look out into the world and declare that the problem is there. Why? Because this prevents us from looking in, where the ego resides. The ego separates us from Enlightenment, and does this intentionally; because where there is Enlightenment, the ego dissolves into nothing. So the ego must defend, as diligently as it can, against us looking inward or it may cease to exist.

Thus the ego tells you to look out into the world, it tells you that the world is separate from you and that the world is acting upon you, and that you must defend yourself against it. When you stop doing this, when you turn inward and focus upon your internal state of being instead of looking out at all the problems “out there”, then the external world begins to change.

As within, so without.

As for what process you use, whether it be Ho’oponopono or presence or something else, it doesn’t matter as long as it does one thing: places your consideration on your internal state of being and not on external conditions.

The problem is within you and not in the world. Put your focus where the problem is. Periodically ask yourself am I looking where the problem is, or where it is not?

The alternative is to continue to engage the world and try to make the world better (as you think it should be). I do not believe in that strategy, and so cannot advise you on it.

Reader Follow-up: I’ve never heard it put quite like this before. You sounded like Nisargadatta Maharaj where we should pay attention to ourselves, and not our experiences.

I’ve never heard it put in context with my current issue of “manipulative people”, but it’s time to look inward in Me and resolve it inside Me.

Follow-up Response:

…where we should pay attention to ourselves, and not our experiences.

Precisely. Your experiences are the outward picture of your inward state of being. Put a strong emphasis on your internal state of being versus what appears to be happening in the world. Focusing intently on self in this way is the best investment you can make.

…it’s time to look inward in Me and resolve it inside Me.

Bear in mind that you are fundamentally perfect because you come from God. You do not need to be fixed; your perspective simply needs to change. When you go inward do so from a place of awareness and not fixing or improving yourself. Be aware of the internal ego judgments about the world, and yourself, and stop granting them the authority of truth.

That’s it.

When you have stopped propping the blocks up they will fall, and you will return to your natural state which is to be filled with God. Perfection will take over then and you will move in alignment with it, because this is who you are. You have to be vigilant, however, in your awareness of the ego because it will come up again and again. Be vigilant for the Kingdom.

You’re doing well. Don’t forget to talk to God. You will always get an answer, not right away perhaps, but the answer will always come.

Reader Follow-up: Yes, all I have to do is be aware of the Kingdom within so that the Divine can shine… He does not “come” at some future time but Divinity or Zero always Is… its my awareness that waxes and wanes…